I have never blogged about my past.  I rarely talk about it any more because there is forgiveness where wounds seemed terminal, but, life now abounds.  But fear was an enemy greater than any enemy of flesh and blood could ever be.  Some of you have asked, so here is a story of one of many times I saw Christ moving in my life.


Love, Diane


“Get out of the house, now!” the caller yelled frantically. “He’s strung-out and has a gun, and says he’s going to kill you!”  Click, the phone goes quiet.


Sitting up in the bed with the receiver still in my hand I stare at the clock, still a little drunk with sleep. It is 2o’clock in the morning.


“Did I dream that phone call, or did it really happen?”  I comforted myself thinking that maybe it was a prank call.  I cradle the receiver and reach for the covers.


The phone rings again, causing me to jump.  My heart is now beating so hard I can hear it pounding in my ears.




“You don’t know me, but he has just left here strung-out on something.  He has a gun and says he is going to kill you!  You have been warned!”

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Now fully awake, I step into the running shorts and shoes, still lying on the floor where I crawled into bed and grabbed a patchwork quilt from the end of the bed.


Running down the hall, I entered into the first bedroom.  Gently taking my son by the arm I whisper to him to get up. He is eight years old and has seen too much of a marriage going badly.   He jumps up without saying a word and staggers behind me to his sister’s room.


Picking up my daughter who is five years old, into my arms, I wrap the blanket around all three of us as we make our way, quickly to the car.  The neighborhood is quiet this time of night. The air is cool and damp, and I’m thankful that I grabbed the quilt.  Nervously I scan the street.  No cars, no movement.


Telling my son to buckle-up himself and his sister, I put the children into the back seat of the car, and throw the quilt over them for warmth.  One more glance around, then I slide into the driver’s seat and begin to pull out of the driveway.


At first I think, “don’t turn on headlights.” Reconsidering, I turn on the headlights.  With adrenaline racing I begin to zigzag through the neighborhood, hoping he was not zigzagging in the same way.


A quick right, and another, “go the speed limit, don’t bring attention to yourself”, I think.


Then I see headlights of a car coming toward me, moving slowly.  Fear grabs me so completely, knives begin stabbing my chest.
“Oh God, Oh God, Is that him?”


The headlights were coming closer.  A wave of nausea washes over me from the adrenaline and fear.  “Do I speed up or stay steady?”  Like a flash of lightning, my mind remembers a Bible verse I  learned long ago. “Fear not, I am with you.”  Taking a deep breath I try to stay steady.


“ I sure hope so.”  I whisper.


The car passes slowly beside me.  The windows are dark, preventing anyone from seeing inside the car.  I watch the car pass and slowly continue down to the corner where it pauses longer than necessary, then continues on.

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The children and I made it to a hotel; all three of us climb into the bed together. my daughter snuggled in on one side of me and my son was close on the other.  We left the corner lamp on as we tried to sleep.


The lingering effects of adrenaline kept me wide-awake, giving me time to try to make sense of the past hour. Like loose paper in a windstorm, my thoughts swirled through my mind, as my finger outlined the squares on my grandmother’s quilt.


She had given it to me as a wedding present many years before. Grandmother, was a woman of great faith and courage.  Her husband had left her, making it necessary to raise four children by herself.


My finger stops on a yellow square in the corner of the quilt. Why had I not seen the blue threads on the yellow square before? Maybe I had, and forgotten.  But there was written in blue, “Fear not, for I am with you. Is. 41:10”


Like a small treasure hidden in time, to be found at this moment.  Did Grandmother know this day would come?  Or was it simply her favorite verse that carried her through her own nights of terror?

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God knows the plans He has for us, and He prepared a way for escape and restoration if we will simply come to Him, trusting that He loves us and wants our lives to reflect His love to the rest of the world.

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Diane W. Bailey is the founder of The Consilium – an online community of wisdom and purpose for women over 45 years of age. She is a published author. Her books include String of Pearls – From Tears to Treasure, and 30 Days To A Better Stepfamily. She creates her own line of precious metals bracelets. Diane lives in the Deep South with her husband Doc. Together they have created a stepfamily, each having two stepchildren and two birth children, and share three grandchildren, one black lab named Charlie and one long haired tabby cat named Lil Girl. Diane’s passion is to encourage women to be all God has created them to be by pressing past fear and daring to live life as an adventure. Some of her life adventures include traveling to Israel, speaking, entrepreneurship and backyard farming with Doc. She loves Gumbo, fried shrimp and seeing all sunsets across water.

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