One of the more painful aspects of being a stepmother, is knowing that no matter how well you do your job, you are never really the mother. They have a mother that they love, and though they care for me and love me, I am more like an aunt in our relationship.
At the beach last week, I watch this father and son, talking about life. I want to join in, but my place is in the background – praying for them and taking pictures.
Watching this young man progress from entering school, to entering college, to entering life, I have always had a back seat praying for him and being willing to help whenever I am asked. That is what stepmothers do, we pray. Prayer is the greatest gift we can give to our family, along with laughter and going with the flow.
These two peas-in-a-pod, they talk and walk together, this dad and son – and I notice that there is a confidence in the son that was not there last year. He is standing with his dad, not in the shadow of his dad. They are eye-to-eye. And, though I am not the birth mother, my heart swells with pride at the boy, who is now a man.
It is not easy to be the “extra” mom, but that is life in a stepfamily. I did not birth him, and he will never look at me as he does his own mother, but my heart still whispers, “my family, my (step) son”.
I am just coming back from our family vacation so this blog is short. Next week I want to talk about helping your child as well as your stepchild launch into the real world.
Please tell me your stories about stepfamily! I may just use some on Stepping up Tuesday!
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