I have loved being a mother to my children and stepchildren.  I loved the chaotic schedules of ball practice, selling magazines, homework, science projects and the arguments over what is right and what is wrong.

I miss my children, who are now adults.

The nest feathered so dearly with porcelain dolls, colorful areas rugs, for the girls and sailboats of blue, with maps of adventures yet to be for the boys, sit quietly now echoing memories of young children.

To be honest, when the youngest child left home last year I think I went into a little depression.

No longer was breakfast a joy, nor was dinner.  Cooking had lost its appeal.  Once I had been so orderly with schedules, and neat clean closets, and always looking for new recipes that would appeal to picky teenage tastes.

Finally I knew that I need to do something or I was going to slip too deeply into a black pit of despair and medication and much counseling would be the only way to get me back out.

Have you experienced any difficulty with a quiet uncluttered life of an empty nest?

Well, here is what I finally come up with as a plan to combat the sad that first showed up when the nest emptied.

See this as an opportunity for personal growth, not an opening to a pit.

This was the time I began writing almost everyday.  I began a blog and started looking for other blogs that I enjoyed reading.  I soon found a small online community that I could identify with and interact with, much like Empty Nests ~ Full Lives.

Rearrange the feathers from your nest.

Now is the time to pull out all of the things you may have pack up because you didn’t want the children to break them.

Or maybe it is time to go and buy that new couch that was too nice for messy teens to sit on.

Maybe its time to clean out one of the rooms and have a project room for you.

Fill up your refrigerator with all of the things you like.

Get the mushrooms, onions.  Get the chocolate that you quit buying because they would eat it all and you never got even one piece!


It is my very humble opinion that the reason we become depressed is because we are only thinking inwardly.  When I feel any depression coming on, I get myself up and go and help others.

Sunday School classes for the children always need help.  I volunteer at an inner city ministry, teaching elementary school girls how to embroidery.  When I show up they all yell, “hey Mrs. Diane”, then they say  “oreo!” and they all run up and surround me with a hug, and I am the white center surrounded by the beautiful chocolate.

They think I am there to teach them, if they only knew I am there because I need the love they give.  They help fill the void of my empty nest.

If you are reading this from the Empty Nest ~Full Lives Facebook page, would you please click here and leave your comments?

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Diane W. Bailey is the founder of The Consilium – an online community of wisdom and purpose for women over 45 years of age. She is a published author. Her books include String of Pearls – From Tears to Treasure, and 30 Days To A Better Stepfamily. She creates her own line of precious metals bracelets. Diane lives in the Deep South with her husband Doc. Together they have created a stepfamily, each having two stepchildren and two birth children, and share three grandchildren, one black lab named Charlie and one long haired tabby cat named Lil Girl. Diane’s passion is to encourage women to be all God has created them to be by pressing past fear and daring to live life as an adventure. Some of her life adventures include traveling to Israel, speaking, entrepreneurship and backyard farming with Doc. She loves Gumbo, fried shrimp and seeing all sunsets across water.

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